Archive for September, 2005

I`m Being Stalked !!!

Huh!!! I mean what the hell is going on..guess I`ve had enough..it has continued for some two days now. I`m at the receiving end of this endless flurry of missed calls, somewhere from Hyderabad, AP. Gosh, this is sick! How come he/ [though I hope]she has such vella time. This person doesn`t give a damn to my sleeping hours [they being exceedingly abnormal, I agree!]. And not one but two phone numbers, both from the same geographical area [I googled that out :D]. Now to the best part – my [supposed] fan is a regular visitor to my blog and website. Now I can understand the purpose of frequenting the blog [its updated] but why on earth to the webpage [its irritatingly static]. Moreover, this guy seems to be obsessed with my photo album [courtesy the installed tracking code].

So Mr./Miss./Mrs./whatever, I know you are reading this. Hence, you are kindly requested not to remain anonymous any further. Just to let you know, I`ve placed my cellphone close to my monitor, that starts flickering when a call is to be connected. You probably know I`ve picked you up 7-8 times already. And I guess it`s far too costly calling from 9848743290 as compard to 040-23757166! Don`t you think its worth talking for a minute rather..I`m pretty much the same as visible in the pics 😀

Kindly discontinue bugging me unreasonably, for it somehow struck me that we have strict cyber laws in India, and I have your IP locked [, Satyam Infoway Pvt. Ltd.] 😀


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Epidemic..Red Alert

This article of mine was published in the Institute magazine some time back. Since I`ve received encouraging reviews about it, I decided to put it up where it actually deserved to be first hand. Read on –

Branded a self-confessed feminist, I have been voraciously criticized for speaking a wee bit too much about the fairer sex : that too from the outrageously outnumbered female diaspora @ IITD! Though sometimes the feminist aspect seems so obvious – to quote Saif Ali Khan in Hum-Tum, “ do you have a better topic to write about than women!!! “. Now I am not Saif, but two of the same species thinking alike should not strike across as a coincidence , right!

This reminds me of the last Humanities course I did, which talked of the dwindling sex ratios in most parts of India : quoting the usual reasons of poverty and illiteracy being the driving factors for the alarming number of female infanticides. I was drawn to wonder : things don`t seem better back home in the hallowed IIT campuses either.

On an average, some 50 odd (pun unintended!) girls are admitted to undergraduate programs @ IITD in a total intake of roughly 450 – a terrific sex-ratio of 11% and a cool 8 suitors for every Portia that gets through! These statistics are abysmal by any standards : I mean in school I had 21 girls in a class of 47 – where on earth are the ladies heading guys? Why is the best engineering school of the country devoid of talent in the sexier variant?

I decided to have an insider`s view on this topic – contacted few members of both the sexes and had their views on the reasons and associated ills of being in a highly minority community in college. Obvious but certain interesting things came out of the survey –

Firstly, why such few girls?

  • They still by and large prefer the non-engineering professions – medical, arts etc. Call it the socio-cultural setup of Indian society or whatever, but say the word engineer and we will probably think of a male. It is really not a socially acceptable profession for girls still, save for those from an educated, progressive parental background. Coaching for JEE automatically then has lesser number of girls and finally they end up in smaller numbers in the institutes. Fair enough – fair hands choosing scalpels over hot-forging!
  • A major number of the technically inclined ones prefer the Regional Engineering Colleges, their proximal locations being an important driving factor. IIT-KGP and IIT-G fare the worst in this regard. I won`t mind more IIT`s if they can promise more girls!
  • They aren`t well equipped to crack JEE ! Well, this can be a debate in itself : exceptions notwithstanding, do most girls just don`t have the required set of mathematical and analytical skills? I`d chose to be mum on this one but for two very interesting studies that accentuate so – a research in Harvard confirms that women are genetically weak at mathematics and sciences at research level; another unconfirmed one says that iron in body hones your mathematical skills – now as they loose iron periodically, girls have a biologically inherent inability to be able to do problem solving of the JEE level!

Now to the amusing (or rather the very serious) consequences of belonging to a rare set of individuals: the opinions here revealed a rather dark side of being a female in the IIT`s, some funny piecemeal incidents in the process notwithstanding.

Most she-participants of the survey agreed on this one – majority of the guys are rather unfriendly (courtesy shyness and hesitation rather than any kind of inherent hostility). They are not anti-feminist (I agree, they cannot be!), but somehow they just don`t seem to adjust to the fact of studying with probably a girl or two in their cycle. Where even talking becomes a luxury, the ‘lesser privileged’ ones seem to increasingly distance themselves, with the end result being the girls getting the feeling of being an outcaste in their own departments. It does inculcate some kind of frustration among the guys, vented out by all sorts of anti-social activities – AOE, drinking, arbitrary time-pass on PCs, and of course the ‘sour-grapes’ kind of back-biting. They don’t turn a blind eye to the females – the girls find a very important place in most of their discussions-but a lot of them cannot even actually confront a girl!

I guess I’m not supposed to digress so much from being a feminist! So now to the apathy of the girls themselves: first of all, they are easy prey to instant stardom, in the sense that they find themselves to be a hot topic among guys, which might just boost their egos. They are likely to fall for the glamour, and build up some kind of attitude. However, as one of the respondents commented, its all “char din ki chandni”, because the guys predominantly believe the grass is greener outside the campus gates! Secondly, they need to give themselves ample time before allowing Cupid to strike. The male bastion shall invariably compare you to Monica Bellucci (supposedly one of the most beautiful women today, for the uninitiated), but you need to realize it’s just the lack of options rather than a matter of choice with them! Off to the worst now – life of an IITian girl is a double-edged sword: if you choose to be slightly reserved and situationally vocal, you are passed off as the “bhaav khaati hai” type!! On the other hand, the outrageously visible and exceptionally friendly ones are branded, well-you-very-well-know-what!

So is the alarmingly lesser number of girls in the IIT`s a cause of worry? Probably yes, because there seems to be a clear loophole in the supposed holistic education being provided to us: why do those hotshot girls colleges from DU have to be allowed for guys to have a paid, later frustrating, one-evening-stands while the Kailashites and the Himadrians have to contend with those oh-so familiar faces, probably better dressed than usual though (thankfully)! The more important question is whether the alarmingly lesser number of girls in the IITs is a cause of worry for us? This is something we honestly need to ask ourselves. We all know nothing drastic can be done to increase the number: but, can there be an attitude change, because it doesn’t really seem to help anyone! How about the gals shelling out their “I’ll just be by myself” cocoons and the guys a bit more responsive, understanding and friendly! Do I sound a reformist? Okay, if you say so, lets bunk the topic. Nobody’s going to alter his/her stand by reading this anyway!

On a different note, writing this article made me realize how I could have as well written about this badly skewed up sex ratio affecting the psyche and the physical/mental/social growth of the males! May be next time I shall advocate our cause brothers. But still, a fact is a fact, I`ve enough of you brothers already around: ye dil maange more, of the femme fatales! Is someone listening?

Time to acknowledge the contributors – Gazal Kalra, Ridhima Tewary as the female and Saurabh Pankaj, Prateek Agarwal as the male participants of the supposed survey! And Taru Kapoor for proof-reading [and ofcourse punctuating, removing grammatical mistakes etc.] this article. Finally, thanks to the Board of Student Publication team for putting in all those efforts and giving us another good issue of the magazine!

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I know its a bad word but I just couldn`t resist writing about mine. However weird that might sound to all you enlightened souls, but I`ve this undefined, unreasonable, ignorant love for Nestle Polo.

Yeah, I just can`t do without that 10 cm, perfect cylindrical pack wrapped in hues of white and green. Even a non-deliberate glance at the mint-with-the-hole seems to freshen me up and enliven my spirits. I know I`m addicted – I`m inadvertently chewing one when am consciously into something, I somehow just don`t feel when it got in, when all the peppermint melted away to the shallow dungeons of the stomach, obliging my taste buds with that icey, sugary coolness and lending me that enviable, perfect kissable breath!

I do feel its absence though : my conscience keeps pinching me all the time, “get up fucker, you are losing on something, you cannot work without it!”. Sometimes I do feel that`s true – if you`ve noticed, when people think, they normally tend to involve themselves in some kind of uncommon activity, say for eg. biting their fingernails or the pen or scratching their heads. I guess when I`m engrossed in some serious thought, I tend to channelize all my worries through that candy being roughed up against those 32 diamond-like stones and those waves of saliva on the tongue bed. Again, I don`t normally feel it but it seems a perfect plausible argument to accentuate my thinking prowess!

If the gravity of this lust hasn`t still dawned to you, then you can confront me anytime and check if I`m carrying this addiction on my shoulders [its normally placed safely in my bag]. And for the one who seems to have realised this first hand, aka my Doctor Daddy, he has this fearsome medical advice for his uncompromising son – “beta itna peppermint khaoge to mouth cancer ho jayega” !!

Naturally enough, I`m trying so damn hard to cut down on my Polo bills..not much success achieved as of yet though!

Anyway, that`s of my arbitrary timepaas. I guess each one of you does have something better if not equally weird, to bank upon while jerking your knees [:P] or may be some genuine stuff/activity you can`t jerk off your mortal existence.

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Tagged !!!

The baton has been passed on to me..here`s my response in the continuation of the tag –

  • 5 years ago : I was 16, the JEE mania had got me over, I was on the road to spoil probably the best days @ school with Resnick & Halliday/ Morrison Boyd, I`d made a terrible mistake selling my Biology texts, I was suddenly serious about life and I didn`t have a fucking hint this girl would propose this Valentine !
  • 1 year ago : I was extremely busy “interacting” with freshers in the midst of the most taxing semester I`ll ever have [guess what, I screwed up..and so fucking badly], things had started looking good on the love front, I was devouring every vestige outta the vast reserves of DC++ with the newly acquired PC and kiddo had arrived 😛
  • 5 English songs I knew all the words to :
  1. Escape – Enrique
  2. Summer Of `69 – Bryan Adams
  3. American Pie – Madonna
  4. Stacy`s Mom – Fountains Of Wayne
  5. Powerless – Nelly Furtado

God.. I realise I actually knew lots more !!

  • 5 snacks I enjoy : Paav Bhaji, Raj Kachori, Paneer Pakodas, Pizzas and Grill Sandwiches.
  • Things I`d do with $100 million : Buy a Merc, own a Yacht, a private Jet, a dog farm, tour Europe, get my IIT degree faked, a Sony Vaio, an Xbox/PSP, devour all kinda sweets, snacks, delicacies, exotic food etc. and later register for a monthly medical checkup @ John Hopkins !
  • 5 places I would run away to : Kerala, France, Home, African Safari and agar time mila to someday I`d come back to IIT-D too 🙂
  • 5 things I would never wear : torn jeans, indigenous sweaters, boxer shorts, that school waala trouser and tiepins.
  • 5 greatest joys :
  1. Qualifying JEE
  2. Her Love
  3. Success/Adulation
  4. Helping Selflessly and Success in bringing smiles.
  5. Making My Folks Proud
  • 5 Favourite Toys : My PC, mobile, my pet, Mr. Dick and kids.

Huh..that was tough but actually led to loads of soul-searching. Thanks to Anjul -> Taru.

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Rendezvous `05 is turning out to be an unexpected success [till latest news]. If Thitholi had some new promising faces this time, the famous Ashok Chakradhar lent a professional backdrop to the whole event. I`ve now become a dedicated fan of “Popular Meeruti” – this guy has an amazing sense of humour coupled with his excuisite style of delivery [Keshto Mukherjee kinda drunken stupor] making him a perfect hasya kavi.

I`d more fun later in the night as I watched this runaway hit movie, “Catch Me If You Can”. Whew ! Just how well these Hollywood directors make movies based on real life incidents. As for the icing on the cake, I was hooked up on chat with this li`l funny, interesting, deep, sensitive gal till 5 in the morning !!!

Day two and I was off for the carrom event. Won all the way to finals and lost by one point there !! Anyway, six hundred bucks for my favourite timepaas, is… priceless 🙂 Rendezvous mein dawaa-daroo ka intezaam ho gaya !

Next to come was the Pronite..Indian Ocean is a great band..they play great music..and they sing brilliantly..however, that`s not why those thousand odd people sweat it out in the long queues and jostle for space once inside the Open Air Theatre..they crave for some foot-tapping and groovy numbers, to get them jiving and put on their dance shoes. That`s where the Tantrikz excel..these guys somehow sense the nerves of the impatient crowd, and hence always score well when it comes to audience satisfaction. Their repetitive, plagiarised song-playing notwithstanding, they were able to keep the crowd on their toes for some two odd hours. Guess I almost fainted yesterday, throwing my body away as they sang, with just a maggi for a meal in the past 24 hours !!! And those truck-loads of firecrackers formed the perfect grand-finale to the star-studded event [the organisers have made sure they infuse enough jwala into the fest] !

By 11 pm, we were at Comesum, that 24 hour restaurant at Nizamuddin railway Station [never knew that`s a fav hangout for the IITians, till I saw many there]… found the Tantrikz relaxing after the performance there…gormandized heavily… on the way back, the auto broke down in the heavy, untimely rains [and I was already drowsing]…back in the hostel by 2 am…found the room drenched up courtesy an open window…brushed and off to bed !!

Day three and no respite from the rain till I`m writing this. I fear a dry day if sky doesn`t clear out soon.

More…in the next.

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Rendezvous Ahoy !

The dragon is back..the [supposed] mother of all North-Indian cultural festivals shall soon [hopefully, Jai Jwala Ki !!] rock the IIT campus. However, having witnessed two instances of it, somehow I no more feel the zeal, the titillation associated with those four days of a completely different IIT campus, the excitement of watching that hep DU crowd and ofcourse the envy [or salivation] of aping their coveted lifestyles !

I remember the first time I`d a rendezvous with Rendezvous – I felt like a caged dog un-leashed, I could roam around at free will [which ofcourse I could anytime, but this was different], I swear there never was such eye-candy stuff available in bulk, I enjoyed every moment of being a security volunteer [:D often found myself confronting hot females requesting to get in..God, how well they do it, and how seductively they decreased distances while speaking..I`d a hard time restraining myself !!], everything was like so grand that the innocent, vulnerable boy I was, it completely overwhelmed me.

No more..I don`t know why, how etc..but it just doesn`t anymore feel the same..I don`t wish to indulge in any kind of eye-popping [those hot chicks notwithstanding!!], no more frolicking around with guys at night hoping to catch a glimpse of a couple or two getting cosy, no more arbit straying around in the day with no specific event to watch, no more than 2-3 events to attend this time over..Huh !!! Nothing..Naught !!

God, what`s up with me ? Please, I`m not aging ! Maturity, is it ? Perhaps yes..I probably now understand the futility of bird-watching [most are unavailable], I know we don`t have socials in our hostel and hence no prior partner for RDX and more, I know she`s sitting for her exams and we can`t help it, I know our very own girls here won`t agree to come over to Nescafe for a casual chat over Maggi and Frappe, I know the ones who can are extremely busy, I know they blabber the same old jokes in thitholi, its the same painstakingly slow Kaleidoscope [they anyway disqualify the leggie beauties in prelims !!], the posters, however classy, just don`t appeal to me, rock was never my cup of tea and waise bhi, ye freshers ke masti maarne ka time hai yaar !!!!!!!!

I know I sound immensely boring and dried up..but thats how it is till this hour..I`ve no hale expectations from this or any further Rendezvous..by the way, I guess this is okay..I know my seniors were equally disconcerted about it when I was a fresher..Huh..thank God, sab normal hai !!! Nay, the youth still remains, the version has scaled..aspirations have changed..I`ve changed..I`m still vital and potent..but I`m no more a teen..I`m 21 ! Guess its time for some..difference.

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Break Free

I mean this is really not fair – we are shifting home, moving to a new city, new people, everything is gonna change soon. And I`m fucking wasting away here in my hostel room, arbit time paas. My conscience wants me to be at home right now, help mama in packing up, say goodbye to the friends I made in those 12 years and so much more.

For one last time I wanna take my dog on his favourite morning walk.. I want to sleep on the bed that gave me the great IIT dream and got me through it.. I wanna cuddle that cute neighbourhood baby again.. want to pay a visit to my Alma Mater – the school, however much I hated it, it shall be the one place I`ll always cherish the most.. I wanna eat that roadside aloo-tikki again that almost always got me scoldings from Dad.. and for one last time I guess I should see those girls who proposed in school !!

But for this god damn IIT faculty, who wouldn`t let me off without a medical on file..who don`t fucking realise every one of us has a family and personal matters to deal with..who just wouldn`t understand sometimes studies need to take a backseat.

Anyway, to hell with everything here..seems I`m just physically present in this room, my mind`s working full time with Ma and Pa and Dollar @ home..I desperately need this homecoming.

Coming folks..I`ll be there soon..I hope 😦

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